Becoming a mother to a little daughter last year made me very joyful. At the same time, it also brought in a tremendous amount of fear and paranoia. Being a woman myself, I have never been as concerned about my safety in this world as much as I feel for my daughter. These feelings of concern for my baby girl soon extended to include the entire female population.
Every time I picked up my daughter and saw the innocence in her eyes, it began to remind me of the atrocities that have been committed against the female, primary among them, being sexual abuse and assault. Old stories of sexual violence against women reported in the media began to haunt me day and night. I began to feel bitter and resentful and asked questions like-
- What kind of an ugly world are we living in?
- Is the female an object of pleasure to be used by a male?
- What kind of beastly people are the men who have abused and tortured women to satisfy their own primal urges?
Being on the spiritual path, I have always found solace in the philosophy that we create our own reality. However, applying the same philosophy after the arrival of my daughter, particularly to the issue of women’s safety, has been challenging. I still believe we create our own reality. But that doesn’t mean we should be blind to the darkness in the world. On the path of spiritual healing, when something begins to bother us more than it should, it is viewed as a sign that
Something related to the problem needs to be healed within our consciousness – meaning we need to view the situation from a higher perspective and make peace with it in body, mind and spirit.
We have a practical role to play in doing something about the situation rather than waste time and energy in endless worry and anxiety.
While the former was my insight, the latter was shared by my husband Suraj. This was indeed an aha moment for me! I believe both these insights hold valid in my case. Often, we get so caught up in our own thinking, we fail to see problems from other perspectives. In such moments, our family and friends play the role of wisdom bearers and step in to show us the light.
The questions I am now asking have shifted to –
- Can I accept that good, bad and ugly coexist in the current world?
- How can I do my bit to make the world a safer place for women and also for men?
- Can I start by sensitising my own son and help him understand the meaning of healthy sexuality in age appropriate ways?
- How can I help create more awareness around matters of healthy sexuality and respectful partnerships between men and women?
While I often dream of a world that is beautiful and peaceful in all ways, I understand we also need to be practical and deal with the reality that is currently in front of us.
Rather than drowning in darkness, I now choose to bring in the Light in little ways and thereafter surrender my efforts to the Universe. I trust the world is becoming a safer place and that the future will certainly see the birth of a new paradigm where healthy, respectful and sacred partnerships are the norm.